Wednesday, May 1, 2013

The Ongoing Quarter Life Crises


Several weeks ago a close friend of mine emailed me an excerpt from one of my old blogs (http://fortysixxx.blogspot.com/p/quarter-life-crises.html). As I read my candid opinions on entering into adulthood, I burst into laughter. Unfortunately this reaction was short lived and quickly replaced by that little emotional gremlin known as “horror.” If anyone saw my face, they would probably agree that I was working through a “you have got to be f***ing kidding me” moment. “What?” you ask could have been so disturbing about the words written by my 23 year old self?  EVERYTHING is what. The excerpt literally sounded like I wrote it yesterday: same complaints, same revelations, and same cynical attitude to mask the fact that the Sex and the City lifestyle I was banking on actually resembles some of the more uncomfortable episodes of Modern Family. In the words the famous philosopher Kanye West, “that shit cray.”

{Disclaimer: My intent was never to begin this most recent attempt at blogging with an emotional tirade, but as my father says, I am not emotionally unstable, just a little “emotionally unpredictable.”  So with this out of the way, I would like to share with you the “so what” of the aforementioned reaction...}

Several years ago, I made a terrible mistake; I fell in love with John Mayer. Unfortunately Jennifer won (at the time), but John left me marked by the lyrics of a song, “Why Georgia.” If you do not recall this catchy little tune, I’ll quickly give you the rundown. John is taking big risks, feeling confused about the potential outcomes of pursuing his dreams, doubting himself and labeling it all as a “quarter-life crises.” When I heard this song, I could not get the concept out of my head, and immediately attributed everything I was experiencing to this natural phenomenon of the early 20 something’s.

My error in all of this was thinking that the quarter life crisis was something I would overcome in a year, two at most…HA. My blog made two things clear 1) I have and always will have terrible grammar and 2) This quarter life crises is a chronic condition. As you can infer, this was not something I was initially very happy about (the chronic condition not the grammar – I have come to terms with that). There was a part of me that had assumed that by 26 I would be married with kids, a leadership role on the PTA and a timeshare in Palm Beach, but this is not how things turned out.

And Hallelujah for that!  

At this point you might be thinking I am bi-polar and I would encourage to revisit my disclaimer. Yes, when I first read my old blog I nearly scaled the conference room table, ripped open my gingham oxford and pounded my chest, king-kong style.  And yes, I only decided against this out of courtesy for my colleagues. But time proved kind, and I have realized that I am so happy that things did not turn out exactly how I had planned. Things have never been so exciting and ambiguous and for the first time in my life, I embrace having little to no idea what is going on.

So this blog is about exactly that: Being OK with not knowing all the answers, making the conscious decision to be vulnerable and let it all hang out (not in the slutty, but metaphorical sense), accepting that there are things I can’t control and nobody that I can. But most importantly, it is about choosing happiness. I do not know all the answers and in fact I don’t know many answers at all, but I have learned a lot, and want to continue to do so. I encourage you to stay tuned, if not to become enlightened (which I would advise against), for comic relief. Until next time, Tootles!

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